What’s Tony Bair’s position on this?
Snap
Arguments for and against Armageddon, one of an infinite series.
Heated political discussion on the shores of Green Lake. Evidence in favor of a healthy democracy. Argument against!
Topic of the argument: war in the Middle East involving Americans, Israelis, and Arabs. Argument for!
Verdict: A draw.
An in-store display of orange, green, and purple pumpkin-shaped trick-or-treat lootbags. Argument for!
“Anarchy in the Pre-K” baby tee shirt in window of hipster children’s store. Argument for!
A battery-powered inflatable fat-suit sumo costume, $22.00, batteries not included. Argument for!
Final verdict: We are so doomed.
The Seated Battle
Personae dramatis
BOB, a meathead sports announcer out of central casting
GOLDIE, a person of ethnicity with a background in sports bookmaking
Setting: The television coverage of a second-rank mid-size purse wrestling match, with a title at stake, sometime in the nineteen-seventies.
—
BOB: Goldie, who’s your pick here tonite at the big Veep Smackdown? We’ve seen that “Big Dick” can wield some pretty menacing vocabulary over the past four years. But he’s thought to have developed a short fuse – and don’t forget that ticker!
GOLDIE: Well, Bob, I heard that the Dick line of thought has been, “If I’m sitting, I might look less frightening and more grandfatherly.”
BOB: “Big Dick”’s challenger, “The Kid,” is a huge favorite with the ladies!
And before he stepped in to the ring, he had an unbroken string of victories
against some real heavyweights!
(Shuffles papers, taps pen)
Goldie, you’re the man we turn to here on Political Wrestling when it comes to matters of the book. You can let us in, buddy – what are the oddsmakers saying in Vegas?
GOLDIE: Well, Bob, the conventional wisdom says that Edwards should just keep trying to scare Cheney. We’re all hoping to hear him be, like, “Well, my esteemed opponent has many years of serv–*BOO!!!*”
BOB (starts, nearly falls out of chair): OHMigod.
(Grasps chest) Oh, I see, the Angina Gambit!
GOLDIE (Rolls eyes, looks skeptical): Yeah.
BOB: What can you tell us about “Big Dick”’s weigh-in stats, Goldie? Did you get a chance to take a look in the locker room and eyeball the guy in his towel?
GOLDIE: He should lay off the fried foods.
BOB: Better him than me!
(Both sportscasters share a manly chuckle)
GOLDIE (clearly directed at BOB): *BOO!*
BOB: AUUGH! Will you stop it! What, are you trying to kill me?
(Grasps GOLDIE by the collar, hisses sotto voce): Lissen, ya yutz, if you do me in, you can’t collect, see?
BOB (using normal, hearty voice): Was he looking fit and ready for battle, or peak-ed and doughy? Was he smoking fat cigars?
(“Big Dick” steps into the ring, unexpectedly)
GOLDIE: He’s clutching his chest, Bob!
BOB (Standing up, chair clatters off camera): Oh my god!
GOLDIE: He was banging cocktail waitresses two at a time! Look at the size of that man! And Edwards comes out wearing only a towel and a smile!
BOB: What’s his wind like, these days? Can he go the distance? Edwards is looking pretty polished there, Goldie. He defintely has his moves down! LOOK AT THAT SMILE!!!
GOLDIE: He’s smiling like a man possessed!
…
GOLDIE: There are definitely Two Americas in this room tonight, Bob.
BOB: “Big Dick” doesn’t seem very impressed, Goldie. He seems sort of… snarly. Still, he’s taking his time. OH! Edwards has “Big Dick” in in a Halliburton lock! Look at those bulging subpoenas! Oh, what a move!
GOLDIE: Oh, who wouldn’t want some Johnnie Walker Black faced with paperwork like that!
BOB: OH! Big Dick used the National Security Reversal – And he’s got his hands firmly locked over Edward’s most formidable weapon, his gleaming teeth!
…
The part of BOB was played by Mike Whybark. The part of GOLDIE was played (unwittingly, to an extent) by Ken Goldstein.
MSH reference links
This is a link-collection entry for quick access to Mount Saint Helens stuff.
Mount St. Helens VolcanoCam: already linked in the temporary image seen in the sidebar. It’s interesting to note that Johnston Ridge Observatory, which hosts the camera, has been evacuated.
US Geological Survey MSH site. USGS MSH Current Activity page. Northwest Interpretive Association.
Gifford Pinchot National Forest Special Conditions: A catchall for stuff happening in the GPNF, such as an imminent volcanic eruption. Come back in a year, and the info will be different.
University of Washington Pacific Northwest Seismograph Network.
USGS/Cascades Volcano Observatory.
Valerie Smith’s MSH site.
1 2 3 4
Johnny Ramone Dead, reports CBS. First spotted here, via MoFi.
Well, kids, that’s a wrap. Kind of a drag. Ramones message board, for those a-feelin’ it.
Galveston
On Septemer 8, 1900, 8,000 Americans perished in the worst hurricane of the century, in a small town off the coast of Texas named Galveston. Here’s a map – the Galveston storm is the topmost track.
Given the worried eye I cast upon the fair city of New Orleans today, I thought a bit of historical fear-mongering was well called for.
The storm was recognized in advance, and the populace was warned, as I understand it. The storm’s ferocity was greater than anything that had been seen within living memory, and therefore these warnings were ineffective.
The NOAA site about the storm notes that “Waves were higher than 15 feet and winds howled at 130 miles per hour.” Currently, Ivan features winds of 140 mph.
The personal account of Isaac Cline, the top U. S. Weather Bureau official on hand for the events is a good place to start. Sensitive readers please note: In the excerpts below, Mr. Cline recounts losing his wife and children to the storm.
“The public was warned,” he writes, recounting his interactions with the citizenry on the early afternoon of the 8th, “over the telephone and verbally, that the wind would go by the east to the south and that the worst was yet to come. People were advised to seek secure places for the night. As a result thousands of people who lived near the beach or in small houses moved their families into the center of the city and were thus saved. Those who lived in large strong buildings, a few blocks from the beach, one of whom was the writer of this report, thought that they could weather the wind and tide.”
He went to his home for a late lunch, and while there, his co-worker showed up.
“About 6:30 p.m. Mr. J. L. Cline, who had left Mr. Blagden at the office to look after the instruments, reached my residence, where he found the water neck deep. He informed me that the barometer had fallen below 29.00 inches; that no further messages could be gotten off on account of all wires being down, and that he had advised everyone he could see to go to the center of the city; also, that he thought we had better make an attempt in that direction. At this time, however, the roofs of houses and timbers were flying through the streets as though they were paper, and it appeared suicidal to attempt a journey through the flying timbers. Many people were killed by flying timbers about this time while endeavoring to escape to town.”
By eight o’clock things had taken a turn for the worse:
“By 8 p.m. a number of houses had drifted up and lodged to the east and southeast of my residence, and these with the force of the waves acted as a battering ram against which it was impossible for any building to stand for any length of time, and at 8:30 p.m. my residence went down with about fifty persons who had sought it for safety, and all but eighteen were hurled into eternity. Among the lost was my wife, who never rose above the water after the wreck of the building. I was nearly drowned and became unconscious, but recovered through being crushed by timbers and found myself clinging to my youngest child, who had gone down with myself and wife. Mr. J. L. Cline joined me five minutes later with my other two children, and with them and a woman and child we picked up from the raging waters, we drifted for three hours, landing 300 yards from where we started. There were two hours that we did not see a house nor any person, and from the swell we inferred that we were drifting to sea, which, in view of the northeast wind then blowing, was more than probable. During the last hour that we were drifting, which was with southeast and south winds, the wreckage on which we were floating knocked several residences to pieces.”
In the morning, the sun rose on a city that had literally been swept away.
The city of Galveston maintains a website that collects a number of information resources on the storm at 1900storm.com. Not terribly long ago, NPR’s Lost and Found Sound did a segment on the storm.
Galveston’s Rosenberg Library has consolidated the contemporary lists of the persons who perished, and published it online, as a part of their online resources concerning the storm.
Ooooh Nooooo!
Stolen from Museum in Norway [NYT]
OSLO, Norway (AP) — Edvard Munch’s famous paintings “The Scream” and “Madonna” were stolen from an art museum Sunday while stunned museum-goers watched armed men threatening the staff at gunpoint as they took the artworks to a waiting car, police said.
As an art historian, several things come to mind:
- The Scream should be visualized making the Mr. Bill expression I have titled this entry with.
- Somewhere a supervillain strokes a long-haired Persian cat, chuckling.
A New Thing
I live in a heavily rental-oriented neighborhood in downtown Seattle. Renters are not, by-and-large, voters, and thus they are not generally campaigned to.
This evening, I stepped outside to take the trash to the dumpster. I’ve been listening to the Democratic convention speeches all week, generally with interest and sometimes with criticisms. Tonight, as I carried my dripping bag of refuse out, John Edwards was just entering the “two Americas” portion of his speech.
To my amazement, the speech did not fade into the distance as I approached the alley. Instead, it seemed to be coming from everywhere. I stopped and listened closely. From more than one apartment and backyard within a half-block radius of my house, my neighbors were tuned in to Edwards’ speech, volume up, as they prepared dinner or puttered in the yard. His voice echoed off the buildings in the summer sun.
I’ve lived in this neighborhood for fifteen years, under three presidents; it’s the kind of neighborhood where I still see Nader 2000 stickers and I doubt that a single person on my block is opposed to gay marriage.
But I have never, never known the neighborhood, collectively, to be so engaged in the national political state of affairs that they would listen to a convention speech in unity. I am amazed.
Tant Pis
So.
It’s hot.
Minimal posting shall ensue.
Serendipity
Viv is in the living room watching TV. Ebert and Roeper are on, reviewing Fahrenheit 9/11. ABC News breaks in to report that the transfer of sovereignty in Iraq will occur on Monday, two days ahead of schedule. Then Ebert and Roeper return to discussing the movie.
I’m thinking that a) these things are not coincidentally linked and b) that’s the short version of the news for the next week. Buckle up!