Big Kel: TCB, baby

The preceding entry, naturally, brought thoughts of Vegas to your suspicious minds. That would of course be both correct and appropriate.

By incredible coincidence, later that same evening, the main attraction was introduced to a sell-out crowd, fans eagerly awaiting a chance to hear the famous and stirring main theme from Kensapoppin’.

To the crowd’s stunned surprise, a legendary entertainer made an appearance instead.

(Don’t be fooled, it’s a fat suit. Plenty hot in there, I bet!)

A visibly moved Patrick Murphy was there, camera in hand, to record the appearance.

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This has been your
Ken Goldstein of the Week Week
Entry NUMBER TWO!!

Thank you.

It's Ken Goldstein of the Week Week!

Due to a surprising wave of third-party Ken Goldstein of the Week submissions, I have no choice but to declare this to be

Ken Goldstein of the Week Week!

Paul Frankenstein gets things rolling with a riff on a post of his own, bringing concrete photographic proof that our dear L’il Kay-Gee is – yowsa – kw-ITE the playa.

THIS has been your
Ken Goldstein of the Week Week
ENTRY NUMBER ONE!!!

Thank you.

Courtesy Frankenstein

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Where did Ken get that cool shirt?

The KGP shop.

Need I say more?

(All proceeds will go to renewing Ken’s lifetime subscription to the Atlantic Monthly.)

I must note that the good Dr. Frankenstein set up the shop, soething I’ve meant to do, but been dissuaded from due to certain unknown parties stuffing the ballot box over at the KGP

more on the lower case

Yowsa! I’m all tapped out for the day – you can find my blatherings here, in the comments on lower-case i, wherein all and sundry have offered opinion and diagnostic on the Great Internet Controversy of Ought-Two, (or is that the great internet controversy of ought to) including a spirited and technologically-informed defense of the capital-I Internet usage by the Gentil Knight himself, Allan Baruz.

I also realized I’d incorrectly memorized the spelling of his name. Double-ell.

In other news, Ken “Jim-Dandy Research Squirrel” Goldstein still doesn’t care for Adaptation despite incontrovertible evidence that it’s hilarious. I should know! after all, I’m a kidder!

That doesn’t stop him (nor should it) from taking a poke at my “jargontastic” recrding of tales of techno-woe from time to time (he asserts “weeks”, but don’t point out that he’s off base – as an accountant, he is very touchy about his dyscalculia).

He also notes, accurately, my undisciplined use of the semi-colon, which I don’t defend. But it’s probably going to stay that way in first drafts, as much of the blog you now read is written.

Finally, he notes the high geek coefficient in my entry about our DVD player cutting out, to which I’ll cop. It’s a hard life, what with being happily married and all; nope, nothing like being the cool man-about-town Mr. Goldstein must be, there in his cozy bachelor pad, overlookinging the gloriuos Pulaski skyway. It’s a wonder I ever found someone.

If only I was less geeky, and, oh, for example, got into the cool stuff the cool kids are into, like fantasy baseball, for example. Or oh, I don’t know, vintage reproductions of early twentieth century semi-professional sportswear. If I got into that I’d probably be as cool as my good, good friend Ken Goldstein.

Did I mention that Ken has aparently taken to posting biting personal accounts of having broken up with the love of his life disguised as restaurant reviews? Poor man. I think I see it now; Adaptation probably struck too close to home. The alienated loneliness of the bitterly obsessed. Poor, poor man.

Won’t someone take pity on him? I’ve heard he’s the swinginest!

Donkey poser

Out-guilting my mother, noted holiday celebrations expert Ken Goldstein notes that he’s already bought my Christmas present, and handily provided a direct link to it so that I can precisely calibrate the appropriate item to reciprocate with.

Some might say that the creation of one’s own personal fan club might be a fair exchange, but far be it from me to point something like that out.

Now, Ken is referring to our happy days at M-2K when we toiled under initial release posters from the fine folks at Demotivators – Ken’s was “Apathy”, while mine was something about silver linings and big, black, scary clouds.

Last year, it should be noted, Ken and his crack staff arranged for me to get a special letter, signed by the director of the FBI, in a gentle teasing gesture to my concern over the erosion of civil liberties in our great nation in the recent past.

So many choices! No small, inexpensive skee-ball games appear to be available, I’m sorry to say (memo to the ball-bearing manufacturers of America: get with the program, folks!).

More tomorrow, natch.